If I've learned anything from being a mama and juggling a career, it's that I can do it all. It may not be perfect. It may not be great all the time. And, it for damn sure isn't pretty. But I basically get done what needs to be done. Life is hectic. Work is busy. But above all else, we are employed, our family is close, we have amazing friends and we are raising the most amazing little man. And he is so, so good to us.
I do find myself wondering if my work/life balance it right. Are my priorities in line? I hate that at times I need to choose my laptop and work emails over playing with my son. I despise having my phone in my hand (or nearby) at all times...just in case. Fortunately, I have a great career which is really flexible, yet demanding enough in that I need (want) to be proactive and on top of things. I don't want to miss anything. I want to be successful.
But there are times that I would love to stay at home with Cruz. See him grow up every day. Teach him things. I get a tad jealous that J gets to spend so much time with him and take him to such great educational and fun places. But then I think, that wouldn't be me. I wouldn't be myself without my career. I love what I do.
So, when I get tagged by a leader in our company regarding a potential regional position that would require travel for a couple weeks a month, but hopefully not relocating, the go-getter in me says, "it's a great opportunity. It would be great for my career. Bring it on!" However, the mom in me says, "how can I spend quality time with my little guy and see him grow up if I'm traveling up to fifteen days out of thirty?" What kind of life is that?
The position would be great for our family...and for our future. It would be a great career move. I would finally get to learn about other markets in the casino industry. We could finally pay off what's left of our debt. On the flip side, it would be traveling fifteen days out of thirty. I would miss out on half of our little guy's life. I wouldn't be home. I would miss out on the things that are important to me - get-togethers with friends and family, girl's night out, seeing my little guy grow up, spending time with Nick.
Fortunately, we don't have to make a decision just yet. The job isn't necessarily going to be there. But it could...so I need to think about these things. And be prepared. And I'm just not sure what would be the best move for us.