It's just that Nick and I have been talking about when the best time to start working on baby numero dos. He thinks
Generally, it's easy to talk him out of things. Or change his focus. His mind works similar to that of a small child at times that if you divert his attention, he usually forgets what he was talking about just minutes prior. In this case, though, he's been bringing it up daily...sometimes even more than that. And he seems serious.
I, on the other hand, am actually the one pushing back saying it's not time. But when will it be the right time? I haven't been able to answer that. I'm not sure. I wouldn't mind getting pregnant around Cruz's 2nd birthday (which, by the way, is the craziest thing to think about....didn't he just turn one like last week?) I want to enjoy my summer with a mobile toddler, carting him here and there. Going to baseball games, taking trips, swimming with him. I want to enjoy my summer with a cocktail in my hand now and again. Maybe try to go to the lake (which lake I don't know, but there's gotta be a lake we can go to around here), go boating, drink some beers, grill some food. I want to be able to imbibe in quite a few cocktails on my upcoming sister trip to LA with Tess (more to come about that in a later post). I want to do all of this and more...and not be preggo.
I didn't love being pregnant. But I also didn't hate it. There were definitely things I loved about being pregnant - the movement, the kicks, my body changing, nesting (I got loads done!), knowing I was growing a baby and thankful I was able to, and towards the end being able to park in the expectant mother parking at the mall. But there were definitely things I disliked about it as well - the puking, the aches, sleeping trouble, wedged feet into my ribcage, getting fat, clothes not fitting, not having energy, not being able to drink.
I also can't fathom having two children. It's hard enough with one and a husband, let alone two little creatures completely and totally dependent on us. Fortunately, there will be times when Nick and I can tag team them, but what happens when it's me against them? They will own me. Cruz already does, so I can only imagine how bad this can get.
So I told him we could talk about it after June, hoping it would shut him up. It hasn't. Actually he just brought it up three minutes ago, in this context I think he was joking to try and get a little action (sorry Carol for the TMI!), but you know what I mean.
What do you think? Is there ever a time you're really, I mean really, ready? I imagine that I will always be able to come up with some excuse as to why it's not a good time. Who knows. I guess we will see who wins out in this one.
On another note, we did make an awfully cute kid. :)